Myth: All Laurels are mean.
Fact: I know it’s going to come as a surprise, but Laurels (and all peers by extension) are just people. They are nice, mean, confident, anxious, scared, and gracious (among a thousand other things) as individuals at different times throughout the day. It is patently false to say “all Laurels are mean” in the same way it is false to say “all people are mean”.
Now as individuals…
If I have a bad day, if my son is especially whiny, if I have a migraine, if I’m preoccupied then I become that story about “all peers are mean because a peer once frowned at me and marched off without acknowledging my presence” or whatever basic “I’m having a bad day and you are not my priority” thing happened. If I’ve ever done this to you I am sorry. I can say with utter confidence it was not my intention to “be mean” and it is unfortunate that you felt that I was being mean to you.
The Laurels in laurel council are repeatedly scolded for “being mean”. That is.. someone somewhere was mean but the person who was the victim is unwilling to call out a specific Laurel or even specific actions so the whole councils is scolded that we should be nicer. This type of general feedback is frustrating. The individual who did the action is left unaware that their actions are the source of the feedback and the greater council is unable to socially correct one of our own because we don’t know what actions prompted the feedback or who is the subject of the feedback. The outcome from this type of scolding is that the Laurels become wary of every interaction with a non-laurel. Every comment might be construed as “critical” or “mean” and so it’s easier to just not comment. It’s only an added bonus (note the sarcasm) that the laurel council also gets regularly reprimanded for being unapproachable.
This was originally posted on my Facebook page on December 16, 2019.
